


On Storms and Change.

by IceBreeze



Category: All For the Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Drabble, F/F, Fear of thunder/lightning, The Queen and The Guardian
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-25
Updated: 2016-03-25
Packaged: 2018-05-29 01:08:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,722
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6352867
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IceBreeze/pseuds/IceBreeze
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Four times Allison spent a storm alone (plus the first time she wasn’t).</p>
            </blockquote>





	On Storms and Change.

**Author's Note:**

> For [Poze-laceen's](http://poze-laceen.tumblr.com/) prompt: 'Allison is afraid of lightening and thunder.'
> 
> Guess who found they really love writing fics in this style and loves this headcanon, so combined them both to make something that they love alot?
> 
> [Please send me a prompt and I'll write something for you!](http://polyhymina.tumblr.com/ask)

**1.**

The first storm happened a few days after Allison had joined the foxes, during that time where tensions were high and, more often than not, when you greeted someone they would spit in your face.

_(Quite literally, for some. People had taken to carrying around disposable wipes incase they had the misfortune to met one of them)._

At this time, Dan was still doubtful as to Allison’s position there (’she’s a modern, spoilt princess. An insane one, sure, but still a princess.’), whilst Allison seemed to distant herself from others, radiating an untouchable aura whenever they were off the court.

_(On the court, everything was different. On the court, none of that came into play because the court was a place where everyone could fight)._

They’d been in the living room of their dorm room when it hit. Dan and Renee had been talking quietly with the TV on in the background, whilst Allison sat away from them, drawing something in a book that lay on her lap. Her attempt to include the other girl had been shot down with a raised eyebrow and blunt dismissal (that was the only time she’d spoken that evening). Then the thunder came, a resounding clap in the distance that seemed to shake the building, followed by a flash of light that promised a storm was coming closer and closer every second. Dan looked up at the ceiling with a glare at that (it was hard to play exy after a thunderstorm), but Renee found herself focused on Allison. At the sound of thunder, she had frozen, body visibly taut as she gripped her pencil tightly enough to snap it, before standing and leaving the room at a distinctly hurried pace.

_(She couldn’t see her eyes, but everything about her body language had screamed panic)._

She felt the vague touch of confusion blending with concern as she let her gaze linger in the direction she’d left, before turning back to the TV. Throughout the rest of the night, she found herself distracted, remembering the gritted jaw and strained shoulders as she mulled over the possibilities. 

_(She thought she knew what it could be, but she didn’t want to assume. It wouldn’t be right to do that; not for her. Not for anyone)._

They didn’t see Allison until practice the following day, where she appeared with a mocking salute to the team and a nod to Coach when he asked her something no-one else could hear. 

_(If she looked paler than usual, Renee didn’t comment)._

**2.**

The second storm came during their second year, on Allison’s birthday. The team was disgruntled when none of them could find her that day (they started a bet on it, but no-one won because she was nowhere to be found), because they weren’t close (the girls were, now, but not the rest of the team. Seth was perhaps the only other exception), but they loved birthday’s.

(Birthday celebrations were one of the few times the Coach supplied them with alcohol and food. Hell if they were going to miss out on that.

They were also a time to remind them that they’d survived another year and nothing could stop them from surviving another).

When she turned up the following day, her eyes were bloodshot and her voice was slightly hoarse, but she met the questions and insults with a delicately raised eyebrow and sarcasm.

_(Renee couldn’t help but think she looked like prey who’d had to face down their hunter)._

 

**3.**

The third storm was two years later, when the team had grown acclimatized to their new additions (like Matt) only to find themselves thrown off by another set of players thrown into the fray. Though with time Renee managed to form a friendship with Andrew, the rest of the team remained at odds with the group. Many were set firmly against Nicky because of his sexuality and his desperate refusal to let anything get him down.

_(They’d spoken about it, once, over a bottle of vodka in their dorm room. Dan had snorted with a wave of the hand that ‘gender is unimportant in life and love,’ whilst Allison had simply taken a long gulp of vodka before stating:_

_“I hate Hemmick, but not for being gay. I’m not a hypocrite.”_

_At the time, she’d been confused because she was with Seth. It didn’t make sense until much later on, when she saw the way Allison’s gaze lingered on people of all sexes)._

Aaron distanced himself from everyone, not trying at all to hide his distaste for all of them and it didn’t go down well. If it wasn’t for Andrew’s presence and the constant threat of what he would do to them, someone in the team would have probably attacked him by now. 

_(”He acts like he’s better than us," Seth had said, voice holding enough venom to kill a man where they stand, “He looks at us with disgust when we all know he’s no better than any of us.”)_

And Andrew. Oh, Andrew. Nobody in the team any particular like for him from the start, but after the whole ordeal with Matt that had fallen to levels that threatened to disrupt them all. 

_(It had taken both her and Allison to restrain Dan from attacking him after it happened)._

Andrew did nothing to help the relationships with anyone, acting openly distant and hostile to them all. (No-one knew how much of it was the drugs and how much was him). And yet, despite everything, Renee enjoyed his company. She enjoyed their companionable silences, quiet conversation and the sparring sessions where she got to finally stretch herself, testing out the parts of herself that she’d long buried and hoped one day to be able to accept.

_(Fighting had always been about surviving, but maybe now she could use it to protect)._

It was during one of these sparring sessions that the storm hit. They’d cut it short so they could get back to the dorms before the worst hit. She returned to find Dan on the couch, sprawled over Matt as they watched a movie together. Allison was nowhere to be seen, and- when she asked- she simply got a shrug and the reply that:

“I haven’t seen her. She just sent a text to say she’d gone to Abby’s.”

_(She didn’t turn up until later the next day looking like she hadn’t slept and saying few words to anyone. The smile she gave Renee did nothing to quell the worry)._

****

**4.**

The fourth storm didn’t happen until the day after Seth’s death, during the week that nobody saw Allison. Everybody walked around with tension in their shoulders and though they all (most) felt some form of grief for the loss, none of them could rival her pain. They worried for her (she’d been the one to find him. No-one had seen her since, other than Coach and Bee, but they wouldn’t share much information at all).

_(Someone had said that maybe she’d decided to join him, but the stare Renee leveled them with made them shut up)._

Renee knew that if anyone could help hold Allison together, it would be Bee. But that didn’t stop her from worrying. It didn’t stop her from calling as she watched the rain and lightning cover the world outside. When Bee answered, her voice was quiet and tired:

“I can’t tell you anything.”

She’d expected this and she knew that Bee wouldn’t break the confidentiality of it, but she asked because she needed to be sure:

“But will she be alright?”

There was a pause as Bee seemed to consider her answer, before she said:

“She’s pulled through before. I’ll make sure she can do it again.”

Thunder crashed again, louder this time, and Bee had hurriedly said goodbye before hanging up, leaving Renee to stare at the ceiling and pray.

_(She tried not to think of the whimper that had cut through the phone before Bee had hung up)._

**+1.**

It was four months into their relationship when a storm hit again. Renee came home to find Allison’s car parked in the driveway of their house, but no Allison. No trace of her being there. She didn’t like it. It felt wrong, it felt like she’d disappeared again.

_(She remembered when Allison would disappear for a day or so, not contacting anyone until the storm was well and truly gone. She remembered pallid skin and dark circles surrounding bloodshot eyes)._

She looked through every room in the house, only to find her in their bedroom. Allison lay curled up on the bed, blankets covering her in an attempt to hide her trembling. Every time the thunder crashed or lightning flashed, she jolted, eye’s wide with terror as she struggled to breathe, to not scream, to remember that _everything's going to be okay because it can’t hurt her- not here, not ever._

_(All this time she’d been fighting it alone)._

Renee’s heart hurt to see Allison so vulnerable (she deserved to live without worry. She deserved to not have to suffer fear, because she’d fought so hard for everything she had), and she found herself moving before she fully realized it. Allison barely seemed to register her presence, only flicking her gaze towards her for a few seconds before the thunder sounded again and she clenched them shut, wanting to block it all out because she hated it, she was afraid of it, she _hated_ it. 

_(They really needed to get noise cancelling headphones)._

Renee lay down beside her on the mattress, murmuring softly as she curled herself around Allison, arms wrapping her comfortingly. They lay like that for a while, Renee talking about mundane things to try and distract her from the thunder (when she ran out of things to say she hummed hymms and songs she loved- the ones that gave her hope), Allison lying frozen in her arms. Until Allison’s hands came to grip the back of her shirt as she clung to her, trying to bury herself in Renee so she couldn’t think about the fear, neither of them had moved. They lay like that until the storm faded away and they fell asleep, safe and at home.

_(From that day on, Allison spent storms with Renee’s arms around her and they were easier to bear)._

**Author's Note:**

> Can be found on [tumblr.](http://polyhymina.tumblr.com/writings)


End file.
